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Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Umbilical Cord Rape

Imagine you're a new being--just fluttered to life. You are in a dark place that is warm and wet and the only friend you know is a cord that runs from your navel to the big loud thing you seem to live inside. You are happy.

Then one day, your world starts to rumble and quake and you know it's your time to be born (as long as you were not induced) and  you try to make your head go towards the light (as long as you are not totally plastered from your selfish mother getting high when she's supposed to be birthing you) only to be pressed and hugged by a yoni (as long as you weren't cut form your Mother like a faulty appendix).

And if you manage to be born on your own time and sober and through the Yoni---they take your precious and lovey cord, the only friend you've had through this 9 month journey, cut it off and throw it away!!

A friend of mine recently pointed out that if we consider someone massaging our Yoni's to be birth rape, how is having a child and not letting it's cord and placenta rot off naturally over a matter of weeks, not cord rape?

I think she is right, my friends. I know that this practice is only a few decades old and not one animal in the world keeps its children with the placenta attached, but it is our duty to do this for our children. We've suffered through almost 200,000 years of Cord Rape and it must stop!

I am naming today the official day of Cord Rape Awareness! Join me in pushing this theory on others.


  1. Now this--this is funny. I like this kind of humor much better than I like reading you attack other people. I had both of my babies naturally and all we did for either of them was delayed cord clamping. A few minutes delayed not a few days delayed. Actually I don't know anyone in real life who had a lotus birth. We've all read about them though!

  2. I think animals chew through the cord and then eat the placenta raw. Would that be an acceptable natural option?

  3. Endless Rain, we are a very lucky be the only one who actually does this..and for no real reason! How special are we?

    Anonymous, it's only acceptiable if the cord is nearly rotted off and it's about to come off naturally. You may then comsume the rotten placenta, raw if you like