Tuesday, May 31, 2011
I am a little appalled at you guys and your selection of midwives from the poll. It appears that Badger Assisted Birth is on the horizon....yay?? What do we know about these creatures that makes you feel they would be good midwives?
We know that they live in holes. Yoni's are like holes and perhaps in cases where baby gets stuck the badger midwife can crawl up your yoni and retrieve the child?
Monday, May 30, 2011
We don't always like to talk about what happens when a miscarriage does not evict the body. We here at Mama Tao believe that all babies, even those who have passed, deserve the sanctity of the Mama's womb.
Sometimes after giving a baby weeks, months and years to pass without the "help" of a D&C, we find ourselves in physical possession of a lithopedion or Stone Baby. It is nature’s way of keeping your dead zygote form infecting your blood (Isn't nature wonderful?!). The body of your little on is calcified in your womb forever!
For some of us though, we want to be able to have more children and until we get this ghost baby out of us, we are unable to do so!
When it comes time to birth (and it IS birth) your stone baby, you need to go someplace where it is quite and you feel special and sacred! Some may choose their bed while others prefer a toilet! It's all up to you.
Begin the birth by drinking Pepsi, Coke or any processed food as it is the surest way to abort a baby!
You will have contractions much like a live birth and eventually your baby will pass. At this point you will have a lovely stone statue to place on your fire place mantle to always remember your loved one! And your womb will be free to have more babies!
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Dear Mama Tao,I just found out, almost too late but not quite yet too late, the TRUTH about the chicken pox vaccine. I was almost going to let my baby have it even with all the toxins because my husband fearmongered me with big words like "encephalitis" and "sepsis," but I was doing my vaccine research when I stumbled on teh TRUTH!The chicken pox vaccine will turn my baby into a chicken. I heard it from my peer and when we all reviewed it we thought she must be right, so it passed the peer review test like every good theory has to do according to the Thinking Woman's Guide to Making My Own Peer Reviewed Studies At Home.Now, I like chickens and eggs, and my baby being a chicken might be a good way to get some farm fresh eggs, but then the truth became as obvious as an infected pox in the tip of someone's nose. People eat chickens, if they are not as educated and vegetarian except for placentas as those of us who have EDUCATED ourselves are. The chicken pox vax is actually part of a SECRET PLAN hatched by Big Pharma and The Kentucky Fried Chicken!!! You bring your baby in thinking she will be safe from a disease that only killed some kids and made all of us only sort of miserable, but really? She's on her way to becoming a Double Down.Now I know the TRUTH and will not let my baby become a double down, nor a McChikenz nor a nugget or tender of any kind. Nor a soup. Nor a pot pie. If only people were educated like me, instead of educateMED, they would see the truth too. However, I fear for them it is too late.Never will my baby ever get turned into a chicken again, even if she might get better from being a chicken almost like in that documentary about Python Monty and the Holy Gruel but not quite. I already called my BFF Jenny, and sent out emails to my naturopath, chiropractor, herbalist, iridologist and non-toxic dry cleaning lady, but I knew that you would want this knowledge for yourself and to help defeat The Kentucky Fried Children conspiracy.I would explain more about all I have learned from my researching, but typing while tandem nursing my 15 babies under age 13 is really hard for any mama.Love, Light and May your Quinoa be Plentiful,Mindy Moonbeam
Saturday, May 28, 2011
|Oh Noes! Gina does not LIKE IT!!|
Well well well, it seems my little friend over at The Feminist Bragger got a special visitor a few days ago. I don't know how I missed this hot mess, but I think I am in LOVE! After a lovely parody post Gyna Cokehead-Cockring's MOTHER shows up to give us the true story about her upbringing. Lodry lordy!
Here is what she had to say:
The simple truth is that Gina is an attention seeker. AND THE TRUTH ABOUT HER LIFE IS NOT EXCITING ENOUGH FOR HER. The truth is, Yes I had Gina at 17, I wanted a baby so bad and I was just too stupid at that time to realize what that ment. But I was a avery good mother to Gina, I still lived at home until she was 2 1/2, by then my mom and dad had Gina so spoiled that all she wanted was them, so stupid me I gave in and allowed her to stay with the most of the time. I married a good man who I am still married to today. I have 3 more kids that all think I'm a pretty good mom. I AM NOT A LOW LIFE, NOR IS ANYONE ELSE IN MY FAMILY, (once again the truth is not as exciting as her lies). I have 2 degrees (nursing and engineering). My husband is an engineer and a Navy vet. So why are we estranged, I'll tell you. It started in 2005 when I came to Chicago for her engagement party. I brought my then 18mo old g-son with me. She went bulistic, even though I never intended for him to attend the party. She went on to call him a "little bastard". And a few more choice words. Then when she got married I was not invited, She made up this insane lie about how I just wanted to go to her wedding to see her father. Saying that I must have feelingsfor him because I have never bad mouthed him in over 30 years. well I don't have anything to say about him, bad or good. We were young, it was never ment to work out SOOOOOOOOOO WHAT!!! Does that mean that I should say bad shit about him. I don't think so. I think that parents should never talk bad about one another to their kids. Fact is Gina was not going to get the wedding of her dreams because she got pregnant and had to rush to the alter. so she had to find another way to get attention. Still I could have forgiven all of that, but THE LAST AND FINAL STRAW CAME OVER THIS LAST FEW WEEKS.... Tell me how you would feel about this..... 1 my father who would have done anything for that girl and for that matter always did, died on May 5th, on his deathbed he said to me "why does Gina hate me so much". She refused to come see him or even pick up the phone and call. Then My Mom went up to Chicago (she wanted to see Gina more than anything). Gina REFUSED to drive 45 minutes to go see my mom. YES THESE ARE THE GRANDPARENTS WHO RAISED HER. My mother has undergone breast CA and a brain tumor in the last 2 years and Gina wouldn't even call her.... I AM SICK TO DEATH OF ALL THE LIES THAT GINA PRINTS, AND SO IS MY WHOLE FAMILY.. There is not 1 person left in the family that will have anything to do with her. It's time allllllll her lies come out. She has tried to turn everyone in this family against each other... BUT NOW WE ALL KNOW IT'S JUST HER LIES. Want to know the truth about any topic just ask, I'll spill....GINA'S MOM
lie#2 that there were NO PLANNED PREGNANCIES IN OUR FAMILY, Bull shit!!!!!! It took 5 years of trying for me to have our last child, as far as I know EVERY BABY WAS PLANNED, (even Gina). Like I said before I just wanted a baby more than anything in the world and at 16 was too stupid to know what that really ment. Furthermore abortion has been legal in the US since 1973, if any of our babies were not wanted they wouldn't have to have been born. I asked my father more than once if he really wanted 5 kids, his response was always the same YES.... He said he really wanted more, but my mom couldn't have any more. Children are very loved in this family and everyone is well cared for.
lie #3 That she was beaten, BULLSHIT!!!! Like I said where's the proof??? Like the time a few months after Me and my husband moved to Fl, she called me saying that my dad had slapped her in the face for something and wanted me to fly her down to stay with me. Which I did (within 24 hours). Well as soon as she got here i found out why she really wanted to come, she went to a car dealer and made a deal with the guy there to sell her a brand new car IF I WOULD CO-SIGN THE LOAN. When I told her no, mind you she was not yet 17 and had no job. She then called her paternal g-mother in Il told her that I hit her (A HUGE LIE). And moved in with my neice. See she started young, she will say anything to get what she wants. truth be told Gina's biggest problem is that she was not spanked enough as a kid. GOTTA TAKE A BRAKE BUT I'LL BE BACK.
GINA'S MOM said...
The simple fact is, I AM REALLY HER MOM. And that is why you will NOT see her use her own name on here to rebutt ANYTHING I say. She knows the truth EVEN IF SHE WON'T ADMIT IT.
It took alot of GUTS for me to come on here and say these things. If you knew me you'ld know how unlike me something like this is. But I just couldn't stand anymore of the "PERFECT GINA SHIT". It's time everyones just what kind of person she really is. And after all what do I have to lose, she already hates me (at least now she has a reason).
GINA'S MOM said...
as for jamie; I respect your right to say anything you like. But I just wonder, why you can't respect anothers right to do the same. I wouldn't dream of calling you names, I don't even know you. The fact is I think you are trying to take the focus off of this blog and put it on you and how you feel, saying that, I think you can understand why I will not respond to you again (unless you wish to remain on the topic at hand) . If it means alot to you to bash me, feel free. i'm a big girl and I know what kind of g-mother I am, so have fun.
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=hp#!/tammy.stockbridge. I hope this helps everyone find my page. Like I've said I have nothing to hide.